Real Love, or Just a Match?
Dating in your twenties can be hard enough- now add swipes, likes, and an algorithm. Dating apps have become the new normal in a digital age of love. For young adults, dating apps are both a shortcut and a gamble—they can lead to interesting connections, but they might also just leave you tired of the game. But it raises the question: are they a path to real love, or just digital distractions?
Popular apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble promise compatibility through curated profiles and countless search filters. They use an algorithm to show you more profiles based on previous ones you’ve liked, but do we expect love to really be predicted this way? You swipe and swipe, deciding if there’s an initial attraction or not, boiling another person down to a singular photo. Rotating one profile for another can quickly and easily feel like a sort of human shopping spree. Apps like these give you the illusion of endless options, but your real life tells you otherwise. Genuine compatibility requires more effort than a like.
I believe these apps only “work” if we show up with true authenticity to our goals within a dating app. The power can still be ours if we are honest with ourselves and others about what we’re looking for, whether that’s a soulmate or a hookup. Either way, be prepared to put yourself out there. This is your life we’re talking about! Moving from the screen to a restaurant table can be daunting, but the one thing dating apps can’t offer is real intimacy—only validation.
No matter what you’re looking for, all dating apps share one common factor: however each app presents it, dating profiles feel like ads—curated photos, catchy bios, and perfect angles. It can cause us to hide our true selves and only show what we want others to see, treating a dating app more like social media than for its intended use. And with that, we experience things like unsolicited nudes, ghosting, and corny one-liners. After so much of this, is it still worth it to date this way in 2025?
It can get exhausting, like you’re constantly putting yourself on display and still getting nowhere. But at the same time, I can’t deny that these apps have their moments. You get to meet people you’d never run into otherwise, and once in a while, there’s someone who actually gets you—even if just for a little while. I was one of the lucky ones. Truly. I never thought that Hinge would be where I really connected with someone.
What I’ve learned is real love takes more than just a match—it takes actually showing up, being unapologetically yourself, and knowing what you want. And sometimes, it means putting the phone down, touching grass, and realizing that the best connections don’t always start with a swipe—they start with you.
zoe
